Shamanic Healing has played an important role in my Recovery since November 2017.
The brew is an ancient, indigenous medicine made from a vine and a plant to create DMT. The medicine itself alters your state of consciousness however this is done in a controlled setting.
Two Shamans guide the Ceremony night. Like any medicine; it comes with it’s own set of risks and rewards therefore I recommend doing your own research.
It is most commonly referred to as “ten years of therapy in one night” however I walked out of my first Ceremony thinking: “This is bullshit.”
To be honest, I expected a quick fix for all of my problems including my Addiction to Opiates. I had no idea the ancient medicine I drank would catapult me into something life changing.
Shortly after my first Ceremony, all of the secrets surrounding my Addiction started dribbling out. I couldn’t deny any longer my use of pills; or should I say my reliance on them.
I had used these pills to cover up the pain and trauma from decades prior. It was becoming obvious to everyone that I couldn’t hold my own any more.
Things in my life had spiralled so far out of my control. My secret life as an addict started to collide with my public life. By Christmas, my husband was going through my phone and began sharing details of my struggle with people.
I had no choice but to come clean to my closest friends. Everything kept getting worse and worse. Finally on Boxing Day, I checked myself into a 48 hour Detox Facility
Unfortunately my time there only lasted 24 hours. It was a Cold-Turkey approach there and it was much too painful. I began spinning and ended up staying away from home for a few days.
I had an opportunity over the Christmas Holidays to do another Ceremony, so I did. By this point, I was in severe Acute Opiate withdrawal.
My body was hating itself for medicating with such strong Opiates. It comes on like the worst flu, cold, depression you’ve ever encountered. It can last for days, weeks, months.
The medicine itself tastes disgusting. It is absolutely putrid – like rank Red Wine. I can never do the full shot in one fell swoop. I often have to take breaks and chew candy to get through it.
This particular Ceremony came at the perfect time. For a night, my withdrawal went away completely and I probably could’ve continued this streak. However, life had other plans and my inability to change my ways continued.
Ceremony itself is very interesting. Ceremonial Tobacco is used and it is shot up your nose to do an entire cleanse of your sinuses. It burns but once that subsides; you feel amazing.
After my first two ceremonies, everything went to shit.
I most definitely expected a quick fix to my problems after the first Ceremony. In fact, I felt bitter that I had spent all that money just to sleep on a floor and throw up into a bucket with 20 people.
Little did I know, the Medicine was indeed working. It was working it’s way through my life in its own magical way.
I had to beg for mercy because life would become harder before it got better. The pain and trauma from my childhood ran so deep, it took about a year and a half to really make progress.
Nothing changed me like this experience because it gave new insight into respecting powerful medicine. I had abused medication intended for Cancer patients. My body needed a powerful detox. It also needed a rest.
Each time I did a Ceremony, I slept. I slept in a deep REM sleep even though there was so much going on around me. I’ve had a sleeping sickness for as long as I can remember.
It’s hard for me to fall asleep and stay asleep. For two decades, I wake up in the morning feeling so anxious that I need to throw up. Usually there is a feeling of intense relief when I do.
In April 2019, I had my 5/6th Ceremony.
My intention to continue this Recovery was well received. Things in my life have continued to change at a rapid pace but I am coping with the emotional intensity.
Being accepted into a community that heals with love and compassion has provided safety and security throughout this journey. There are so many people just like me who have literally “tried everything.”
Trying everything means everything your Doctor prescribed or Talk Therapy. Some of these work well for people so we cannot ignore their value however it is important to get to the root cause.
I am not perfect. I never will be perfect and I will always struggle with Mental Illness. It has been something I’ve had to accept.
Untreated and unaddressed trauma creates so many emotional issues inside of each and every one of us. Intense healing was what I needed to be well.
My last Ceremony on June 28th was an interesting one. For the first time, I didn’t throw up which is status quo when accepting the medicine.
You can always expect to throw up because that’s what the medicine is about – powerful detox.
Continuing with this alternative healing and the standard with our Healthcare system has saved my life from Opiate Addiction.
There has not been just one thing that gave me this freedom from active addiction but my experience with this type of healing has played a pivotal role.